Overcoming mental barriers is hard.
The worst create varying degrees of doubt, insecurity, confusion, anger, suspicion, fear, and instability.
Overcoming or reducing mental roadblocks is challenging.
If you’re experiencing any of the bad feelings listed above, you likely won’t want to address the problem alone.
But who can you trust? Or even feel comfortable talking to?
If you share your inner thoughts, you don’t want to be criticized or made to feel even worse. You want to feel better.
And so, unless you are completely sure that you know someone you can safely rely on to help in the right way, you’d rather just keep enduring the mental pain.
And by enduring, let’s be clear that we mean suppressing, ignoring, and not dealing with it any more than you have to.
This avoids the problem of talking to someone and winding up feeling worse. But it ignores the reality that when you don’t deal with the problem, the root problem, you’ll keep feeling bad or even worse anyway.
So, you have to do something to reduce or eliminate the pain. And realistically, that means relying on another person or persons to help.
My dad was a professional who helped patients with mental problems. He became a doctor in the 1950s and went on to specialize in psychiatry and, ultimately, psychoanalysis.
He was kind and reassuring, so his patients felt comfortable talking to him about whatever was bothering them.
Everything they told him was kept in the strictest confidence. He never spoke to me or anyone about his patients.
His whole focus was to listen, understand, and help them reduce anxiety, fear, and confusion.
By talking to my dad, his patients clarified the source of their anxiety and fear. They got clear about how to change the disturbing thoughts in their head.
This took time, but they always felt at ease because my father guided them and reassured them that they were on the right path.
My dad was really good at being reassuring and understanding.
I know this because that’s how he was with me and my brother and with his family and friends. He was truly non-judgmental, open-minded, and kind.
That was a big part of how he helped his patients.
I got to know many of my dad’s colleagues as I grew up, and while they had different personalities, they were all kind, caring, understanding, compassionate, and non-judgmental.
And so, their patients were well cared for and felt safe when they were working on overcoming mental roadblocks.
The thing I learned from growing up the way I did and observing people is that we all have mental barriers (not to be confused with mental models).
We all have disturbing thoughts, dreams, and disturbing anxieties, fears, confusion, and uncertainty.
Some people can overcome these things on their own, in some way or another.
But many people need outside guidance, at least for a while.
I needed it, and fortunately, I felt comfortable asking for help and then found a qualified doctor I trusted.
His name was Remi Gonzalez, and I spent a few hours a week with him for a couple of years, and I’m glad I did.
Remi is why I finally did well enough in school to get into law school and then excel there.
If you struggle to overcome mental barriers, there’s someone you can trust to help you overcome the anxiety and doubt.
I know this for a fact.
You just have to decide you want to find that person.
The sooner you start looking, the sooner you’ll find them.
And the sooner you’ll start feeling better and making big improvements to every aspect of your life.
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